Tomorrow, I’m buying a Meth Star.
The game is Clicking Bad, the seedy cousin of Cookie Clicker where instead of playing Martha Stewart for your virtual, text-based friends and family, you’re put in charge of both the manufacture and distribution of methamphetamine. It is, of course, based on AMC’s recently concluded original series, Breaking Bad, though you’re no Heisenberg at the start.
When you first load up the game, your batches are deadly. Through the use of upgrades, like better chemistry equipment, you can up the purity of your product from possibly-lethal to the quality blue glass seen in Breaking Bad – though no one’s recommending you smoke that, either. Except, that is, your buyers!
Distribution starts out just as low as your drug’s grade, from street thug dealers to shady vans that roam the city, seeking potential customers. Eventually, you’ll have enough money to pay cartels to move your crystal, and even a sleazy lawyer to sell some on the side while reducing your risk of getting caught.
Your risk is a constant factor affected by everything you do, measured in a percentage that can be drastically increased or decreased, depending largely on your spending habits. If you put too much into pushing your product, and not enough on things like lying low and a good attorney, you’re gonna get busted by the DEA. That means the loss of RVs, storage sheds and other makeshift labs, which can be a huge blow to production in the early stages.
It’s worth the wait for you to purchase and upgrade those lawyers early on. Once you have a steady and self-sufficient output without a chance of getting caught, you can eventually afford some of the more corrupt methods of distribution, like hiring a DEA informant or buying out the city’s police force. These entities wil sell plethoras more of your product while simultaneously reducing risk. Your meth might be pure, but the law, not so much.
Clicking Bad is fun for its dark twist on the text-based clicker game, a type of browser-based diversion that I had shunned in the past for its boring repetition. What this tells me is it certainly helps having a meaningful context to an otherwise meaningless string of numbers constantly shooting up. I was able to get a kick out of this just for being a fan of Breaking Bad, but after a while, I did start wanting something more. Randomized events that are more complicated than just finding or losing barrels of cash would help. Candy Box was an ASCII game with a surprising amount of depth, not quite the same format as Clicking Bad, but I feel like the latter could benefit from the same kind of interesting scenarios in Candy Box – ones that actually call for significant player action.
The way it is now, Clicking Bad is pretty easy.
Still, as far as psychostimulant supplier simulators go, it’s a good one. Click your way to wealth and corruption here in Clicking Bad! But remember…