Blow Me Away: Curtain Simulator 2013

Curtain Simulator 2013

Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! THAT’S BECAUSE YOU ARE A PAIR OF CURTAINS! Oh, yes, don’t stop this wave of silly simulators now; we’ve got Serious and Important work to do. Like, uh, making games in which you play any and every object imaginable! Is this a problem for anyone? No? Alright, then. Curtain Simulator 2013, people. This is the latest in simulators, and it’s not as dull as you might think it to be, unless, of course, you think being a pair of curtains is the best gaming experience you could possibly have, in which case this should live up to some of your expectations.

So let’s pull ourselves together and figure out what Curtain Simulator 2013 is all about.

In truth, you don’t so much simulate a pair of curtains, though they are the focus of your interaction. I say that because you simply move your mouse around to control the wind that blows the curtains. With the right music, you could probably have quite the relaxing experience with this, actually. Cloth simulation in games always comes across as highly advanced technology, and the smooth flows and ripples you can create in it is naturally imbued with peace.

Curtain Simulator 2013

But that’s not what Curtain Simulator 2013 is all about. It just potentially could be if you wanted that.

Instead, we’re instructed in the game’s tutorial to move our mouse around vigorously so that the curtains tear! I don’t know what kind of tear you’re thinking in your head, but I think you’ll be surprised as to what these curtains do. There are multiple levels with curtains in various different places, like in front of a toilet, a shower curtain and a butcher’s shop window. Each of these have different reactions to your left mouse button clicks, some of which are surprising and erupted a joy in my heart that I can’t explain.

Call this a toy or a game. It doesn’t really matter, to be honest, but what does matter is that Curtain Simulator 2013 exists, and it is free. There’s a custom level creator on the way at some point too. All I’ve ever wanted to do is create my own curtains and tear them. This is my opportunity to shine!

Curtain Simulator 2013

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